Do you find yourself talking to yourself? Do you find yourself questioning your sanity? I heard once that you are only crazy if you actually answer yourself. Well, maybe we aren’t crazy – in fact – maybe self-talk is what keeps us sane!
My May/June edition of Psychology Today actually had an article about Self-Talk, The Voice of Reason. I’ll buy that just on the title – I always knew I was more reasonable than others – my logic always worked for me. Right? As it turns out – yes, you do have the best advice for yourself –… Continue reading
Don’t fart in public!Why?Because it goes against our social norms. As social beings, we follow a list of prescribed social norms for the society we live in. I would love to find society where farting, picking my nose, and burping in public were all socially acceptable. However, because I live where I do, I work very hard at being normal.When we fart or burp, we may blush with embarrassment.What happens when we fail? Generally, we feel shame. Fart in public, and you probably feel shame (maybe run down the other aisle in the store leaving your offense behind you.) We immediately try to do something that will bring us back to appropriate behavior. We want to remain a part of our tribe. Continue reading
This is a beautiful video that I felt goes along with last weeks blog on anger. Continue reading
According to The Secret Language of Feelings – (TSLF) by Cal Banyan founder of 5-Path Hypnosis, anger is the feeling (or fear) that something is unfair.You can almost see that little child inside you stomping his/her little foot (maybe with hands on hips – that was my style) and saying, “That’s not fair!”However, at a very young age, most of us are told to stop showing our anger – it wasn’t civilized or grown up to show your anger. In fact, in many cases, it was taboo – a big no-no. And we very much wanted to be grown up, so we held our anger in like good little boys and girls. The problem is that we often are not taught how to constructively deal with our anger. And not dealing with our anger can be very destructive.In my last blog I stated that ALL feelings are good – so then am I saying that anger is good? Continue reading
We are all supposed to be happy – right? It is even written in the Constitution of the United States of America that we are guaranteed “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” So, what happens if we aren’t “happy?” Is there something wrong with us?In fact, we are so geared into the fact (or is it fantasy) that we are supposed to be happy, that we take pills to make us not feel our feelings and instead feel happy. Some of us call them our “happy pills!”I am calling happiness – and the pursuit of it – a myth. And the reason is that, in my opinion, we will never be truly happy under the conditions we set for what happiness entails. Continue reading
How much do you suffer from held anger and hate? How much do those feelings lead your life?I have discovered that many of my clients suffer from an unlived life or a partial life due to long held anger toward someone who may not even part of their life any longer. Common sense would tell us to let go of useless anger. But what we tell ourselves in our logical mind does not always pass through to our subconscious, which tends to hold on to anger, fear, and hate year after year after year.So, how does one get over this – let go for real? Continue reading
FEELINGS! IT'S ALL ABOUT FEELINGS!Feelings – we all have them. But do we really know what we are feeling? Most of the time we are clueless as to what we are feeling.Let’s take for example hunger. We are watching TV and suddenly we will get the munchies. Something in us tells us we really want to eat something.You know how this works. You walk into the kitchen and start looking through the refrigerator, the cupboards, and those places you stash the “bad” snacks. Sure there is food in all those places, but you are on the search for something – what is it? Continue reading
Self-talk has been a topic of those in the healing field for a long time. So, long in fact, that I thought “everyone” knew about self-talk and how it truly affects ones thinking about themselves. And yet, day after day, it is proven to me by my clients that there is still not enough talk about self-talk.What is self-talk?Basically, it is exactly as it sounds – how you talk about yourself to yourself. Far too often we are extremely critical of ourselves – and we let ourselves know it. Mistakenly, we think, “Oh, it doesn’t matter, I know I’m kidding.” I say “mistakenly” because it is a HUGE mistake to think how you talk about yourself does not matter.There is this little thing called a sub-conscious, which is what I work with during hypnosis, and let me tell you, your sub-conscious does not take anything as a joke. No matter how funny you are, your sub-conscious is NOT. That huge part of your brain sees everything as black and white, right and wrong, yes or not. There is no gray, maybe or perhaps. So, when you say terrible things to yourself, like “I am so fat, ugly, dumb, etc” your sub-conscious takes it as absolute fat (and saying, “I’m kidding,” doesn’t work). Continue reading
I just finished training in Las Vegas for a wonderful new process called Gastric Band Hypnosis. It's great! The client goes through the process of the gastric band surgery - but without the surgery! How does it get better than that? Well it does because it has a 95% success rate - better than the band itself.Anyway, I decided then and there that I was going to start saving money so that I can go to the National Hypnosis Convention in Massachusetts in August and also take the Stage Hypnosis course. No sooner did I decide that then my crown fell off my tooth. I thought it could just be put back on - but no way (it has a hole in it) so $1000 later I will have a new crown.So, what happens to our plans? I know I am not alone in planning one thing and then life decides - uh uh, no way - I have other plans for you. How do you survive these shifts in plans? It's not easy! Continue reading
Why We Self-Sabotage (continued from WHC Insights Newsletter - if you missed your copy, just email me and I will send it out to you.)In WHC Insights we discovered how we all self-sabotage. The first of the Four Reasons was Our Values are not Attuned to our Goals and two, Fear of Failure. Now on to reasons 3 and 4.
3. Fear of SuccessYup, you can have fear of success. How? The biggest fear of success is that you will actually succeed – then what? How will you be changed? How will life change? What will friends and family think? Continue reading